Cold Flame
by anek
Summary: Tsuzuki must know the difference between love, lust, and friendship... but will it be too late? YAOI Tsuzuki x Hisoka, Muraki x Tsuzuki


Cold Flame   
  
By: anek  
  
  
  
A/n: Hiya ^o^ I originally intended to make this a one-shot fic, but damn, it's getting too long and as I was writing it, some plot twists came to my mind so I ended up deciding on probably 2 or 3 chapters XD  
  
  
  
Alrighty, I've decided to keep this PG-13, but it is originally NC-17. If you want to read the UNEDITED version (and yes, with all the yummy smut and stuff) read it from my site -- http://www.animewood.com there's a link right on the front page so you don't have to look farther.  
  
  
  
Warnings: Yaoi, ANGST!   
  
This chapter contains a Tsuzuki x Hisoka sex scene that I didn't include here... check out the UNEDITED version if you want to read it ^^;;  
  
  
  
Disclaimer: Yami no Matsuei and its characters belong to Yoko Matsushita-sensei.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~oOo~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Chapter 1: Love  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
The fading sound of clanging church bells told him it was just past midnight. The desolate night was silent, save for the ominous ticking of his wristwatch, and the approaching heavy footsteps slowly walking up the stone stairway that lead to the gothic-looking church at the top of the hill.  
  
  
  
The double front door was wide open, letting him feel the chilly autumn Nagasaki breeze. How long has it been since he'd first stepped inside this church?  
  
  
  
Three years...  
  
  
  
Countless times, he wished he'd never set foot on the cursed house of God, the very place where he first met the man who still tormented him...  
  
  
  
A tall figure stood in between the tall doors. Behind him, the pale moon reflected its light on the man's silver hair, making them seem to glow like liquid silver.  
  
  
  
The elongated shadow seemed to slither on the carpeted floor as the tall man approached him. Tsuzuki didn't move from where he was curled under a wooden pew. His violet eyes followed the tall man gracefully striding down the aisle looking every inch like an elegant groom about to claim his bride waiting at the altar.  
  
  
  
The man took a seat on the pew next to where Tsuzuki was curled under. There was a soft creak, but even the small sound seemed to reverberate through the deserted walls. His violet eyes stared at the polished black leather shoe the other man was wearing, the dark hue making a stark contrast to the rest of the taller man's attire who was clad in all white. It seemed to be his favorite color.  
  
  
  
"I heard what happened, Tsuzuki-san..." the voice was deep and smooth... but never soothing. No, that deep voice only knew mockery and cruel laughter.  
  
  
  
"I suppose it was to be expected," the man continued when Tsuzuki didn't answer.  
  
  
  
They stayed in an almost companionable eerie silence for a while. Tsuzuki's breathing became so faint that the taller man was forced to occasionally glance down at the violet-eyed man curled like a child near his feet.  
  
  
  
"Will you kill me... Muraki?"  
  
  
  
"Aa," Muraki replied slowly after a brief pause, bending over to brush a stray strand of dark hair that hung over Tsuzuki's eyes. He loved looking at Tsuzuki's eyes... they were always the brightest of jewels, a pair of glowing amethysts.  
  
  
  
But those eyes were dim tonight... dry as if there were no more tears left to cry.  
  
  
  
"When I die, I will kill you Tsuzuki-san. I will not let any other man have you. Such is my selfishness," he finished, leaning back on his seat satisfied at having made his claim. The wooden pew gave another creak.  
  
  
  
The Shinigami's eyes remained blank. The soft moonlight made them look almost translucent.  
  
  
  
"Ne... let's go, Muraki..."  
  
  
  
Muraki's lips curved in a slightly pensive smile. He had heard those words before, back in Kyoto more than two years ago. Tsuzuki had looked very beautiful covered with his own blood, and more blood dripped from the knife he held. Tsuzuki had stabbed him back then... but what resentment he might have felt vanished when Tsuzuki uttered those words...  
  
  
  
"Let's go, Muraki..."  
  
  
  
He had resigned himself to death then... in fact, he found himself looking forward to it. Dying with Tsuzuki... such was the death he truly wanted.  
  
  
  
But it wasn't the right time for either of them.  
  
  
  
He was pulled from the dark flames Tsuzuki had conjured to consume them both, and he found out later that his violet-eyed shinigami had been rescued by his colleagues.  
  
  
  
Muraki's thoughts came back to the present when a fairly strong breeze came rushing inside, knocking over the lone flower vase that stood on the altar. It went crashing to the floor. The water seeped through the dark red carpet making it look like crimson blood... a sight that was pleasingly familiar to him.  
  
  
  
His gaze came back to rest on the beautiful man that curled like a frightened child under the pew next to where he sat. He leaned forward. With little effort, he lifted the smaller man from the floor and settled him on his lap.  
  
  
  
"Aa... we'll go wherever you want, Tsuzuki-san... together..."  
  
  
  
Muraki bent to brush his lips against Tsuzuki's. The shinigami's lips were cold and unmoving.  
  
  
  
Tsuzuki felt the feathery kiss. Muraki's lips were warm against his frozen ones.  
  
  
  
A ghost of a smile formed on his lips. Yes, sinners like them should suffer in hell... together...  
  
  
  
"Hisoka... gomen nasai..."  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~oOo~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
***6 MONTHS EARLIER***  
  
  
  
"Bakayarou! Look what you did!"  
  
  
  
Tsuzuki flinched as the light-haired youth looked ominous enough to cut him in half. He had been too overjoyed having a whole apple pie to himself that he had been eating too heartily, not noticing that he had just flung a good portion of the sticky filling and crumbs on Hisoka's denim jacket.  
  
  
  
He eyed the slice of pie on one hand and the half-bitten green apple he held on the other and mentally debated which one he should sacrifice in order to help Hisoka.  
  
  
  
Hearing his partner let out another stream of curses, Tsuzuki dumped both on his desk in panic, right on top of his paperwork.  
  
  
  
"Wah! Gomen Hisoka!"  
  
  
  
He dabbed his hands on Hisoka's jacket in an attempt to wipe off the apple pie filling, but realized too late that his hands were in fact even grubbier, making the denim fabric of Hisoka's jacket even more soiled than it already was.  
  
  
  
"Eh heh... wari..." he mumbled brokenly.  
  
  
  
"BAKAYAROU!!!"  
  
  
  
Tsuzuki sat back on his chair, almost teary-eyed in distress.  
  
  
  
"B-but I'm really sorry, Hisoka!"  
  
  
  
Instead of the usual blow he expected, Hisoka produced a white handkerchief from his pocket.  
  
  
  
"Give me your hands," his younger partner demanded in a commanding tone.  
  
  
  
"Eh?" he asked in surprise, but obeyed meekly when Hisoka glared at him clearly saying that he wasn't going to say the same thing twice.  
  
  
  
"Honestly, you're such a klutz. You ought to be ashamed of your self, Tsuzuki," Hisoka was muttering but Tsuzuki was still partly confused as his gaze followed Hisoka's ministrations of his hands.  
  
  
  
"But what about your jacket, Hisoka?" he asked quietly after taking a peek at Hisoka's face. The younger shinigami's brows were furrowed in concentration in getting off the gritty bits of pie on Tsuzuki's hands.  
  
  
  
"Urusai," was the curt reply.  
  
  
  
"Ha-hai," he answered timidly and stayed quiet.  
  
  
  
It was some time after that they realized they were in the middle of the office and had attracted quite a few attentions. Watari made a snide comment about the poor 'ol wife taking care of a useless overgrown toddler for a husband.  
  
  
  
"Eh?" Tsuzuki asked with genuine curiosity when Hisoka flung the white cloth to his face and hastily excused himself, blushing and mumbling something about getting some fresh air.  
  
  
  
He caught sight of Tatsumi leaning against the doorframe of Kanoe's office, a slightly wistful smile tugging on his lower lip.  
  
  
  
"What is it? Tatsumi?"  
  
  
  
Giving his glasses a slight tug, Tatsumi cleared his throat.  
  
  
  
"Nothing, Tsuzuki-san. Just get back to work."  
  
  
  
Tsuzuki's eyes darted back to his paperwork... and widened dramatically when he realized the mess he had just made in his earlier haste. The apple-pie's filling was all over the papers on his desk.  
  
  
  
"Eh heh..."  
  
  
  
"Really, Tsuzuki-san..." Tatsumi sighed in exasperation. "Never mind that, I'll give you other copies."  
  
  
  
"Wai! Thanks Tatsu-- "  
  
  
  
"But I'm doubling your work for today, that should teach you a lesson not to eat while working," Tatsumi added before turning on his heels.  
  
  
  
Tsuzuki slumped on his seat.  
  
  
  
"Wah, Tatsumi! Hidoi!"  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~oOo~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
"Hisoka! Hisoka! Waaaaah! Hisoka!"  
  
  
  
It was the noisy bawling that woke him. He opened his eyes to see a teary-eyed Tsuzuki, albeit gloriously naked, shaking him so hard that he thought his neck would snap.  
  
  
  
"Hisoka! Are you alright? Hisoka!"  
  
  
  
He opened his mouth to let out some a string of curses, but simply turned beet red when he realized what had just happened.  
  
  
  
He averted his gaze.  
  
  
  
"I'm ok..."  
  
  
  
But Tsuzuki didn't seem too convinced.  
  
  
  
"But you passed out! Was I too rough? Hisoka! Gomen! Gomen!"  
  
  
  
He flushed redder than he already was. It was different wantonly expressing one's passion when in the throes of lovemaking... but somehow, he didn't have the courage to admit having passed out due to too much pleasure.  
  
  
  
"Baka! I said I'm fine!" he snapped.  
  
  
  
Tsuzuki seemed to give it some thought before shrugging and gathering Hisoka's exhausted body close to his own. He switched their positions so that the smaller Shinigami lay on top of him.  
  
  
  
Hisoka silently listened to Tsuzuki's heartbeat in tuned with his own, a faint rosy glow still lingering on his pale cheeks. Before drifting off to sleep, he realized Tsuzuki still hasn't pulled out of him. Although it was getting a bit uncomfortable, he closed his eyes with the tiniest hint of a smile lingering on his lips.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~oOo~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
He woke up the way he expected-- comfortably tucked in a blanket. And he knew before he even got up, that a pair of soft slippers would be waiting for his feet. A robe was carefully laid beside the table lamp... and by the way the morning breeze through the slightly ajar window carried a faint smell of burnt bread, he knew breakfast would be waiting for him in the table too... not that it would taste good... for he knew all too well the person who prepared it was by no means a chef.  
  
  
  
He flung one arm on the other side of the bed. It was still a bit warm... but empty. He ignored the slight ache in his chest. It was to be expected of course. And that was the way he wanted it.  
  
  
  
They had been lovers for months now. After a night of intense lovemaking, he'd never find Tsuzuki the morning after... and he knew all too well the reason why.  
  
  
  
It was him who told Tsuzuki so. He had been too worried of people finding out about their intimate relationship. Although Tsuzuki had pointed out that their friends have probably already known, he had insisted. They would be nothing more than partners in the outside.  
  
  
  
And Tsuzuki didn't say anything else, just nodded silently and smiled. Since then, Tsuzuki would visit his place every night, and leave before dawn. But Hisoka would always find everything set for him... a warm breakfast, even a warm bath waiting for him.  
  
  
  
No one had ever taken care of him the way Tsuzuki did...  
  
  
  
He hugged the pillow closer, murmuring Tsuzuki's name in a softly muffled sound.  
  
  
  
Tomorrow, perhaps tomorrow he would ask Tsuzuki to stay...  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~oOo~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
  
  
A/n: lol... hope that was ok... I'd love to hear reviews! thanks. Forgive me if it the parts are a bit chunky, I just took out the yaoi parts without much editing XD 


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